I’m 40 but see the world as a 4 year old

I recently had a conversation with a good friend of mine about her 4 year old son and how he hasn’t learned yet to prioritize visual stimuli so he easily misses things or  is overwhelmed.  The filters aren’t yet automated for him. It was funny because I didn’t have to explain to her what I’m experiencing from my visual deficit because she gets it…I see the world like a 4 year old, except I KNOW that I see the world like a 4 year old. (Does this warrant a shout out to my brain tumor?!?) Instead of not learning it yet, I am very aware that I have lost my filtering mechanisms. I am conscious of missing things. I don’t trust my vision because of this. I am that person who will only cross a street at the crosswalk and when the light tells me to or while holding onto the arm or shoulder of the person I’m walking with because otherwise I am literally afraid I will get hit by a car that I did not see. This is obviously just safer anyway and how crosswalks are designed to be used in the first place, so in the end I guess my wonky eyes have forced me to be a more law abiding citizen and a better role model for all those actual 4 year old kids crossing the street with their parents. Yay me!


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