Overwhelming NYC

I’m back. About to start my third round of chemo and turn 40.  Woohoo.

Yesterday was somewhat of a bummer day unexpectedly.  My chemo was pushed back a week after I accidentally took too much and so Mom and I took advantage of a week of me feeling good.  We spend a couple days in NYC.  Chihuly at the Botanical Gardens then the Guggenheim.  Unfortunately, I couldn’t handle the Guggenheim.  It was too overwhelming for me. I couldn’t look at the artwork to the right and walk around to the left because I can’t see to the left.  It was a little easier once we went all the way to the top and came down because I could just hold onto the railing with my right hand and look to the left, but it really reminded me of the visual deficit and I was bummed that I couldn’t enjoy the museum. I think it was the first time I really got upset about some ability that I’ve lost. Bummer for sure.

I also learned that sitting in a car driving around the city was extremely difficult for me. I got really anxious.  There was just so much going on all around me and I can’t process it all and it was not fun for me at all. Also a bummer.  It is just way too easy for me to get overwhelmed by things that are very busy and that are unusual or out of the ordinary for me.  I suspect a combination of the eyes and the slowed cognitive processing.

My eyes do continue to amuse me though. The other day I thought that people were saying Einstein was exposed as a sexual predator.  My thought was, Really?!? Then I realized I didn’t see the W because it was all the way to the left and in my blind spot.  Einstein is still good as far as I know.

2 thoughts on “Overwhelming NYC

  1. Einstein seems to have had an affair or two while married, but since the affair was consensual with everyone (except presumably his wife), we can’t get too excited.


  2. Ah my dearest. I will sit w your hand in mine and we can slow things waaaay down. Living in the jungle, I find places like airports and driving in city traffic very overwhelming. You are so welcome when this process gives you space. Happy birthday. 🎁


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